If Looks Could Kill.....

......then this one is designed to kill slowly and painfully.


This is Vicky's cat Lillie, this is her angry face, she has two faces, angry and happy. Unfortunately, when she's happy she moves around too fast and I can't get a decent picture. So below is the closest I got to it:

She always looks like she's got a bit of a grump on, but you can see a definite difference right? That's the difference between 'I'm hungry' and 'Mmmm, full belleh'. When she's happy she chirrups at you when you call her name, it's exceptionally cute! Although you can't really tell in these pictures, she is a tiny little diminuitive kittie.

This next one here is Vicky's pride and joy, Mister Neelix.

Such a poser! Neelix is possibly one of the most malleable cats in the world, you can get away with squishing him into any weird position you like. Try doing that with the little monster giving you stinkeye (thanks #167 Dad) in the first picture.....do you WANT to lose an eyeball? Cos you will!

Mister Neelix once went missing for 17 days during Autumn/Winter. Being a purebreed he has severe food allergies, and going missing for 17 days is bad enough without having that issue on top. I think most people had given up by the time Vicky put an ad in the Croydon Advertiser....but lo and behold it worked, and someone called her up a few days later. He's a miracle puss.

Mister Neelix hovering for warmth over the radiator.

You may have noticed the gorgeous curly coats this pair have. Part of the reason Vicky got these guys is because they don't shed, and the person she was living with had bad cat allergies.

Mister Neelix is a Cornish Rex, and Lillie is a Devon Rex. Cats normally have 2 types of fur, the undercoat which is to keep them warm and is all downy and soft, and the upper coat which is more waterproof and more tough and wiry.

Mister, the Cornish Rex, has only the undercoat, which means that his fur is gorgeously soft and downy, Lillie has only the upper coat and so her fur is quite rough. The curly coat is characteristic of both their breeds.

They're quite closely related to Siamese cats, hence the big bat ears and slanty eyes. Steve (who lived with Vicky before I moved in), said that Mister Neelix was the devil who had been sent to kill him. I can't say I blamed him after he told me this gem of a story:

( I'm on MSN with him right this second and asked him to reiterate the story so I have it in his own words. His response was 'VICIOUS EVIL BASTARD!!!!!!!')

"Right so i'm there in bed having nice dreams that didnt involve cats.

I subconciously hear a click and open my tired little eyes, I notice my bedroom door is slightly ajar and raise my head.

The door swings open to reveal a terrifying beast.

Neelix is stood there on his hind legs with his front paws held aloft in a deadly looking ninja stance, CRAZED LOOK IN HIS EYES!

IRISES BLAZING RED LIKE A DEMON CAT FROM THE VERY PITS OF HELL.

SAMURAI SWORD IN HIS HAND.

Luckily I am trained in multiple unarmed combat techniques and I dove across the floor commando stylee.

Before he had the chance to pounce I slammed the door in his little mush and latched it behind me.

He clawed the door but luckily it was made with high grade ply wood, he issued a mournful cry and walked back to his lair.

I lived to fight another day."

Ok, ok, so, maybe I shouldn't ask men to tell stories, I think that part of that may have been slightly embellished, in order to make The Steve look like Steven Segal or Jean Claude Van Damme....or someone cooler......Spiderman?

A quick story of my own...I once left a pair of shoes at Vicky's house after a night out, a nice pair of diamante/black satin latin dance shoes (although they were already shagged out by that point). When I next saw Vicky, she gave them to me in a plastic bag with an apologetic look on her face.

" I found one of them in the cat litter box when I cleaned it out"

Mister Neelix clearly has excellent taste in latin dance shoes and had decided to drag one into the litter box to keep him company whilst he went about his business. Much like one year Vicky heard some strange noises coming from the other room, and found Neelix trying to pull a christmas ham through the cat flap. Who knows where that came from? He's also a bin raider.....allergies? What allergies? I don't care if all my hair falls out!

Ahhhh, cats, you gotta love them....especially these two!